My first attempt at bloggin, ya'll so be kind! Let's start off at the beginning!

I am 28 years old. Have been married 10 years this month. I have had two boys. One is 9, the other would be 6 now, but tragically passed away due to S.I.D.S in October 2005. I've been through as much in my lifetime as most others. I have taken it out on my body for sure. Emotionally eating, depressively sitting around watching life pass me by. Thinking of all the things I've lost, rather that what I could gain.

I joined the gym in February with something to prove. That once I put my mind to it, I could achieve what others so easily obtained. Funny thing, it got me nowhere. I tried several diet pills or weight loss programs..no results. Being a student and a stay at home mom, I couldn't afford personal training. I saw the commercial for Biggest Loser Arkansas a few months ago. And there was my chance. 10 weeks of free training, a specific diet, and all that stood between me and my shot, were over 300 applicants.

Link here to my original submission:

http://arkansasmatters.upickem.net/engine/Details.aspx?p=A&c=35530&s=9470588&i=1&m=X#SD

I waited. Actually had almost forgotten about the contest. Went about my daily routine as usual. Fluctuating a few pounds up and down each week. I never gave up. I was determined to do something every day, even if it wasn't helping me, it was something. And it counted.

Last week. I got a call from Jake @ 10 Fitness! He said I had been selected to recieve an interview for the contest! I called him back immediately and we set up a date and time. The interview went great. I felt like I had a good shot. I held my head a little higher that day. I couldn't wait to tell people, but I wanted to make sure. I let my family in on the possibility. I was overwhelmed with the support I received. Jake had said he'd call me that day or the next.

I waited....anticipating. The first day passed. I still held onto the chance of getting the call tomorrow. The next day passes, it's evening. Im almost defeated at this point. Trying to keep my head up, there was still a chance until the announced winners on Tuesday. I wasn't out yet!!

I was on the phone with my sister in law, telling her I figured I wasn't picked. I hadnt gotten a call. I was still ready to keep going, but understood the possibility this wasn't for me. While I'm telling her, Jake beeps in, almost hysterical I screamed at her, "its him, he's calling me RIGHT NOW". I switched over, he couldn't even say hello, I was so excited.

I told him we were just talking about him, and the fact that we figured I didn't make the cut. He was very apologetic about the delay, but with opening a new gym and getting the contest going, I forgave him for being busy! Lol He said they'd really like for me to be one of the 4 if I was up for it. I tried to act surprised with a "really?" But I knew when I saw his number it was my time to shine!

And we were off..first up, live television broadcast announcing us to the public...link below.

http://arkansasmatters.com/fulltext?nxd_id=457817&shr=addthis

I knew my life was about to change. Of course I got behind schedule on the day of. Had to chase a stray kitten out of my house, check my fluids, fill up my tank and I was off. 22 minutes until broadcast. I mapquested the address and set my GPS to get me there. Of course traffic wasn't flowing very quickly. I had knots in my stomach..would I make it?

I went in circles around the KARK building, not figuring out how to get in. Devastated, it's two minutes to air, Im driving around aimlessly. I finally suck it up and call Jake. Im like "man Im lost, Im so sorry" He was quick to get me on the right street, but wouldn't let me off the phone until I met him in the elevator. He walked me up to the news room, all of a sudden I see a room full of people.

Already it's the first day, I'm late and I show up with no supporters. I did not know friends and family were allowed to sit in during the broadcast. I'm feeling nervous, and a bit foolish at this point. I'm alone. I was quickly introduced to the other trainer Allen. We exchange numbers and it's off to the set.

During commerical breaks, they filled us in on where to go and when. Put us in pairs of two, I was going on the second segment, so I had time to breathe. I watched as the other 3 contestants talked to Mallory LIVE on the Channel 4 News! I heard their questions, and their replies..thinking of what I would say when it was my turn.

It's on. I hear her call my name. As I approached her, and saw one of the monitors, I see the teleprompter..it reads...Leah Browder : speaks. LoL I lost my mind. Forgot everything I had planned to say. I went on to listen to her questions. I could hear the nervousness in my voice as I answered to the best of my ability. But I recovered. I did fine. I expect less nerves with each week. I'm a natural..I got this!

Next we went to get our before pictures taken. Of course mine had to be horrible, but hey, the before picture is always supposed to be right?! lol Link below :

http://arkansasmatters.upickem.net/engine/Details.aspx?p=A&c=38849&s=10557143&i=1#SD

This is the page I can recieve comments on. This is where my blog will be posted each week during the 10 weeks of competition! You guys can leave any kind of comments you like, don't worry if they don't go up right away, moderators have to approve them first, and they're busy people too.

Leave me some songs for my playlist to keep me motivated. Encouraging words are always welcome and totally appreciated. I need all the support I can to continue on this journey. I won't be doing it alone..you are all with me. Every time I think it's too much, or I can't go any longer, I will think of having to blog to you guys..that I failed..

That's not a blog you'll be seeing!! I plan to take the result of the last ten years of my life, and squeeze it into the next ten weeks. I plan to learn, heal, energize, outdo, and revitalize myself. Here is my chance to get my confidence back. Here is my chance to get healthy. Here is my chance to prove to myself, and anyone else out there, it is possible, it can be done, and "where there's a will, there's a way"

"Lead, Follow, Or get out of MY way" This is MY journey...and it begins NOW.